Sometimes it feels like when they gave out disability I got the buffet!

My body aches because I have fibromyalgia, my joints and muscles don’t do as I say due to my Ehlers Danos( EDS). I have FND which is Functional Neurological Disorder and means my body and brain can do things that I don’t realise they are doing, from tics to seizures to random movements or even shutting down.

The dessert bar to my buffet is ASD and ADHD which keeps thing interesting.

Obviously I’m a positive and happy person as I think when you are up against these kinds of challenges daily it’s your mindset that makes a difference. Hence me making jokes

All bravado and humour aside though, disability is tough, some days are seriously tough. I don’t often go to new places because I can feel sick from anxiety, the fear of what my body or mind might do next. How I’ll be treated, stigma, shame blah blah. You know the drill. It’s really exhausting.

I saw the Cérge stuff happening and it looked interesting. At first I didn’t think it would really be able to help me because I’m not in a wheelchair and don’t “look like I have a disability “.

Sometimes I feel like I’m not worthy of the extra help, I didn’t really know how they could even help. However, I wrote to Cérge and chatted on Live Chat and decided to try it out.

I visited Burpengary Regional Aquatic & Leisure Centre as the heated pools are great for my muscles and bones. I also like to colour in as it keeps me calm and slows my mind down. I filled out my profile on the Cérge app and said I would like them to show me where the amenities are and maybe a quieter place that I could colour in after a swim. I wasn’t asking for much and I probably wouldn’t usually ask because I’d feel judged.

When I arrived, Jason was the staff member who served me. He was so kind and approachable, he knew I was on the way. It kinda felt cool to know that he already knew stuff and I didn't have to be awkward trying to explain whilst navigating my anxiety. He was genuinely helpful and really wanted us to feel at home…. And we did.

We had a great swim and my body felt so relaxed, we sat at the table and coloured in under the trees and sun. A new place and yet I was so comfortable, this would never happen. I either wouldn’t go or I’d be in and out. It helped that I had looked at the Visual story so I knew where everything was and what everything looked like before I arrived.

I really thank Jason and Cérge, this experience left me feeling like an everyday person trying new things and not feeling anxious and worried about what could happen. Plus the live chat on Cérge was super fast and helpful, kinda like a little friend in my pocket.

I’ll be back!!